August 2011
11 posts
Wrap Up: What I've Learned Along the Way
First off I’d like to thank everyone who read and enjoyed my blog along this journey. Thank you for tolerating the awful grammar and spelling errors that were a result of me writing these at a very late hour. I’ve re-read most of my posts and have hopefully caught enough of them to prevent me from looking like a total retard. At some point I’ll be printing out some of...
Day Nine: All Good Things Must Come to an End, for...
I had a short but great nights sleep in my cheap motel with blood splattered carpet. If there’s any spirits with unfinished business they must have been busy tormenting their killers or their families instead of sticking around this hole. I hop out of bed and take a shower. When I walk back in the main area I realize I’m standing on one of the stains with wet feet. I start...
Day Eight: The Good, The Bad, and the Racist
Morning in Gillette WY and I’m still aching. I’ve now accepted this is how I’m going to feel the rest of the trip. I take my time getting ready and have checked out of the hotel at the latest point of the day yet. It’s 10:30 now and I’m hungry for some lunch, Yelp says to try some Italian place nearby, I get a bit lost and spend about 10 mins trying to find this...
Day Seven: Due East
Morning, another night with only 7hrs of sleep. I cant seem to get any more than that this entire trip. The hotel I’m staying at has some free breakfast voucher at the attached restaurant but they’re taking forever to seat people so I passed. I geared up, checked out and went searching for breakfast. I settled on some place called Buckaroo Bill’s since they’re the...
Day Six: Escape from Yellowstone
Nicest hotel at the end of the longest day and I get the shortest night of sleep. This was the first day I had residual pain from the previous days ride but all those gripes washed away when I found out the free breakfast included make your own Belgium waffles! The batter dispensed out of something identical to a soft drink machine and they had two legit cast iron flip hinged waffle makers....
Day Five: I'm a Murderer
Despite the shitty hotel this was the longest nights rest I had all trip but it was also the night after my longest ride yet. I discovered the walls at the motel were quite thin when the husband of the Calgary couple I was talking to the night before was waking up with a headache and voicing his displeasure. Thank god they put me on the opposite end of the building so I didnt have to hear that...
Day Four: The $300 Fun Receipt
My last day in Seattle and my first day progressing east towards home. It was good to catch up with Manny, things are going great with her and Zach and it sounds like they’ve been entertaining the idea of home ownership in a gentrifying and awesome neighborhood. She’s also prepping to start a serious photography program which I’m amped to watch her progress through. A good...
Third day: Off To Seattle
Hooked up my bags (the right direction), checked out of the hotel and made my way out of Portland. I could definitely see living there if only they had hockey.
Final notes on Portland:
People are VERY protective of their walkways and all traffic will stop for them till they’ve cleared it seems. One woman got VERY upset when I turned into one when she was 2 steps off the sidewalk and...
Second Day: Portlandia
Not that there’s anything wrong with Eugene but after buying the bike I wanted to head straight to Portland after hearing so many positive things. My urges overcame my better judgment which would have told me to get the oil changed ASAP. As stated before the bike had been ridden 100 miles throughout the previous owners entire ownership of the bike and he had never changed the oil. In...
First Day of the Reverse Oregon Trail
After multiple delays and lots of flying I arrived in Eugene at 2pm their time which means it took 12hrs of travel to get there. I was pleased to find out the guy I was buying the bike from was an older IT manager and not some young stunter type. He had purchased the bike a while ago from some rich kid that was unsatisfied with the power who sold it to him with 2400 miles on it, it had 2632...
November 2008
1 post
“Yeah man, I haven’t brushed my teeth in seven years. You know its not bad...”
– Homeless man at Palmers Bar in Minneapolis.
August 2008
10 posts
“Yo mama so fat that when she went to Valleyfair they didn’t let her on the...”
Tip for those fresh to the IT industry
This tip applies to users you’ve seen in person before:
When helping the user over the phone that is incorrectly typing in their password, remeber if they’re obease or not before saying “Well, maybe you’re fat fingering it”.
“WE RACE OUR 1950’S TWO AND FOUR CYLINDER 18 STROKE CARS UP NORWEGIAN HILL!”
– Heavy set drunk man at 331 Club with a masters degree in fictional engineering.
“We should just go to Lake Calhoun and hand out our business cards. That’s...”
– Group of three fresh out of college business men in the skyways.
July 2008
9 posts
My Bike Jerks Photos →
Pictures I took at this weekends Bike Jerks style skid event. Click “My Bike Jerks Photos” above for more!
“If I ever have sex again I pretty much know its going to be awesome.”
– Heavyset nerd in Nintendo shirt at Club Jagermeister
It's grammatically correct
Friends Sister: Yeah he’s just dumb that’s why it seems like he’s gay. me: So are you saying that gay people are dumb? Friends Sister: Yeah, that’s a fucking stupid thing to do to me pidgin toe me like you even know me! You don’t even know me! me: Pidgin Toe? Friends Sister: Yeah, it’s grammatically correct! me: *laugh*
Things I Like.
I like that IBM Thinkpads can double a murder weapon.
Fighting in Open Hockey.
What better way to prove to everyone how hardcore you are about the sport than to drop gloves on a guy at open hockey? Incidental contact resulting from a race to the puck IS a direct challenge to your skills and must be resolved by attempting uppercut him through his metal cage mask.
This is where the url’s name came from and I’ve had this conversation more than once.
“Why is Your Last name Wong?”
“Because I’m half Chinese”
“Oh, so is your mom or dad?”
“What?”